ascari

World: Homestuck; Lapfoxtrax
Characters: Jackal, Renard, Klippa, Mayhem, Mischief, D-Mode-D, Emoticon, Adraen, Kitsune^2, TQBF
Wordcount:
Summary: It's a crossover. Updating as more comes. ALL IN ONE POST.

SBEAT

-- smalNasta [SN] began pestering galacticDancing [GD] --

SN: Yo. I think I have a problem here.
GD: whats up?
SN: You know that game that Darius was talking about that's supposed to end the world and shit?
SN: In some kind of self-referential mindfuck where he vomits up the universe after it ends or something retarded like that?
GD: yeah he totally sent that to me _again_ yesterday in an email attachment even though i cant count how many times i explicitly told him im a console only guy
GD: like why do i need all this crap clogging up my inbox every week
GD: im never going to play the damn thing
SN: Do you still have it?
GD: i dunno
GD: might still be rotting in my trashbin
GD: why? you want me to send it your way so you can give it a test run?
SN: More like I already tried my copy as a test run in a fit of absolute soul-sucking boredom.
SN: And apparently I need another player to play.
SN: It's a two player thing.
GD: shit dude i dont really have the time to invest in a pc game with you right now
GD: i have my own stuff going on okay
GD: still have stuff to move around the house
GD: arrows to stomp
GD: im busy
SN: Okay, that's understandable. I get that you're busy.
SN: I'm only asking because apparently there is a timer ticking away in my taskbar now.
SN: And when I asked Darius about it, he said it's my deathclock.
SN: Apparently if I don't play this piece of ass and get someone else to play with me, a meteor is supposed to fall down from the heavens and smash me to ashes??
GD: holy shit
SN: Only reason I'm asking.
GD: is he for real
SN: As far as I can tell, he is very much for real.
SN: Darius knows his space mechanics and the meteor tracker he sent me was scary as hell.
SN: Timer on the link matched the one in my taskbar perfectly.
GD: how does a space rock just _suddenly_ up and decide to smash someone because you decided to play a game?
SN: Got me.
SN: Not like weirder things haven't happened.
SN: Remember that time Adraen punched an alien space ship to bits and then fell from orbit?
GD: that was a scripted thing
SN: Dude, are you going to play this with me or not? Because I will ask someone else if you are too busy denying the possibilities here.
GD: why dont you just hit the road
GD: dodge it
SN: It's gonna hit whether I run or not.
SN: And who am I to back down to a challenge?
SN: Hey, Renard.
SN: Renard.
GD: what
SN: Do you want to play a game?
GD: oh fuck you and that saw bullshit
SN: Hahaha.
GD: the least you could do is stick to re-animator if youre going to do horror movie references
SN: Fair enough.
GD: fine ill play this piece of ass with you
GD: are two players enough or am i going to have to drag someone else into this
SN: Not sure. Waiting for Darius to respond.
SN: Although, if the world really is going to end we should probably get everyone in on a long train.
SN: Loop as many in as possible or something.
GD: whatever
GD: installing now
SN: Shit yeah.
GS: shit yeah

SN: What's wrong with this fucking picture?
GD: hahahAHAHA!!!
GD: looks like youre wading in bad guys dude
GD: watch that asshole dropping down on your six
SN: Shit.
GD: shouldnt have put that copy of metal slug in the kernel thing i guess!!!!!!
SN: Stfu.
GS: lmao oh god im crying
SN: Yeah, thanks for the help, bro.
GS: nice!!!

-- galacticDancing [GD] began pestering electroCute [EC] --

GD: hey how busy are you at the moment
GD: pretty busy eh?
GD: okay whatever ill get back to you later
EC: Hey whats up
GD: so jackal has fucked himself up the ass with that game darius keeps sending to everyone
GD: asshole actually booted it up and played it!!!!
GD: holy shit how dumb can you be???
EC: Is he for real
EC: Isnt that supposed to
EC: End the world or something
GD: Y E P
GD: he pinged me earlier begging me to save his ass from apparently _meteors_ raining down from the sky
GD: so ive been playing this game with him
GD: watching him run around and do puzzle shit for the past hour
EC: Oh god not puzzle shit
EC: Im not that big a gamer to begin with
EC: But even i know puzzle shit is the worst
GD: well it really depends on the genre and how well its integrated into the gameplay
GD: but for this its just sort of _hilarious_
GD: from my perspective anyway
GD: watching him run around in his fancy chav boots punching cards and cursing up a goddamn storm
GD: what an idiot!!!
EC: Hahaha
EC: It serves him right for bein such a dick
GD: thats what i was thinking
EC: Take screenshots for me
GD: way ahead of you
GD: check it
GD: ASS_ASS_ASS_ASS.png
EC: Lmfao
EC: How in the fuck
EC: Did he get in that position
GD: absolute asshattery
EC: Sending this to mischief
GD: hahaha
GD: okay but before i link you the rest of these i got a question for you
EC: Shoot
GD: apparently because he started up this game the worlds going to end
GD: so i wanted to see if you could run your copy and hook up to me
GD: get a long chain going so all of us can escape the apocalypse or however this works
GD: darius isnt answering so i have no cheats
EC: Right now you mean
GD: if youre ready
EC: Is the world really going to end
GD: looks like!!!!!
GD: you should have seen the meteor that slammed into jackals flat
GD: like seriously the whole block is on fire now
EC: Shit i just ordered new instruments for my band
GD: hahaha
EC: Can you give me an hour to do some shit
EC: Then I can run that fuckin game
EC: And join up w/ you and jackal
EC: Mischief gets in on this too btw
GD: yeah thats fine
GD: god what even do you need to do when the world is ending???
EC: Im sort of a big deal renard~
GD: lmao not this again
EC: (◕‿◕✿)
GD: haha
GD: oh god
GD: fine whatever
GD: go do whatever it is you need to do
GD: im gonna get in touch with someone else in the mean time
GD: see if they can hook me up
GD: when you get back we can get you and mischief in
EC: Sounds great

-- electrocute [EC] began pestering smalNasta [SN] --

EC: Nice ass~
SN: Wtf?
EC: Lmfao

-- galacticDancing [GD] began pestering clockworkMonster [CM] --

GD: hey are you not too busy being a big asshole diva??
CM: That's not really my style.
GD: great!!!
GD: yeah i know
GD: mayhem was being a pain in my ass
GD: have you talked to jackal recently?
CM: He's playing Darius' doomsday game.
CM: That's all I know.
GD: yeah thats why im bothering you
GD: how do you feel about the world ending and you being stuck behind in the burning carcass of the ruins
GD: just you and the zombies
GD: wait shit actually ignore that last part
GD: zombies would be hella sweet
CM: World's ending, I'd rather not stick around.
CM: More interested in making things than conserving shotgun ammo for the rest of my life.
CM: Badass as zombies would be.
GD: hell yeah
GD: how do you feel about running your copy of the game to connect to me
GD: i swear i can see the huge fiery ball of death thats bearing down here to take my house out
GD: its like a fucking spotlight up there and i dont even have game shit set up yet
CM: So that's how the apocalypse is going down?
GD: apparently!
GD: and i just started renting both floors last month too
GD: hell of a waste
GD: my consoles had better make it over the divide
CM: Yeah, I can hook up with you.
CM: Be a shame to see all those arcade relics go up in smoke.
GD: see this is why youre good people
GD: you understand my passion
GD: and i guess youre yanking my ass out of the fire here
GD: that definitely counts for points too
CM: Glad to be of assistance.
CM: Downloading this file now.
CM: Is Darius coming in with us?
GD: not sure
GD: neither jackal or i have been able to get a hold of him since jackals flat exploded
CM: Whoa.
CM: Is he okay?
GD: yeah hes fine he wasnt there at the time
GD: although neither was the apartment???
GD: whatever its hard to explain
GD: youll get it when you connect to me and get a feel for how this all works
GD: its intuitive as hell despite the set up and the technobabble
CM: Cool.
CM: Who else is in on this?
GD: mayhem and mischief and i think jackal lined up tqbf too although hes offline now
GD: ill probably ask some other people when im not about to _explode_
GD: waiting on you for that!!!!
CM: It's installing, Ren. Chill.
GD: awesome
CM: Once you're safe you should ask Dee and Dee.
CM: But that's fine. Mayhem can connect to me after this.
CM: I don't mind her diva attitude.
CM: She's a doll.
GD: you are a fucking saint dude

-- electrocute [EC] began pestering skeejasaurusRex [SR] --

EC: Hey lovely~
EC: Apparently the worlds ending today
EC: So clean off your schedule and get your ass home
EC: Im heading to the studio now
SR: Wait, what?
SR: What are you talking about, dear?
EC: Jackal started playin that doomsday game
EC: Worlds ending
EC: Nurse has a ploy to save our skins but we have to be in different buildings
EC: So im heading out
EC: See you soon~
SR: Oh hell, are you kidding me?
SR: We just bought all those new instruments too!
EC: Thats what i said
EC: But w/e
SR: Why would he do that?
SR: If there's one person who knows what he's talking about, it's Darius!
SR: You listen to Darius!
EC: Fuck if i know
EC: Oh wait i have screenshots from nurse for you
EC: ASS_ASS_ASS_ASS.png
SR: LMFAO!!!!
EC: Rofl i know
EC: Hahaha shit i keep crackin up
SR: Oh god, I think I will actually enjoy playing this if those kinds of things happen.
EC: Right??
EC: Get all the shit you want to bring w/ you
EC: Then go home
EC: Nurse will have someone for you to hook up w/
EC: I will see you then
SR: Sounds like a plan! n3n
EC: Kiss kiss~~ ♥♥♥

-- smalNasta [SN] began pestering clockworkMonster [CM] --

SN: Yo.
CM: Evening.
SN: Ren says you're in on this?
CM: Yep. Setting up his stuff now.
SN: Cool.
SN: Do me a favour.
SN: Make sure he prototypes that fucking Metroid game he's always going on and on about.
CM: Is this a revenge thing?
SN: C'mon, mate, I am in no way a vengeance kind of guy.
SN: Gore and carnage I can totally dig.
SN: But revenge is below me and you know it.
CM: Slip in the language.
CM: Let me try again:
CM: Is this a sibling rivalry thing?
SN: That it most definitely is.
CM: Heh. You're sadistic.
SN: You know it.

-- galacticDancing [GD] began pestering clockworkMonster [CM] --

GD: OH MY GOD WHY DID YOU LET ME PROTOTYPE THAT THING???????
GD: HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CM: Run! Head left!
CM: No your other left, moron.
GD: FUCKING FUCK!!!!!!
CM: Just fucking stab it in the eye!
CM: Christ.
GD: OH GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CM: Is it dead this time?
CM: Ren??
GD: SHIT
GD: okay yeah i think its dead
GD: LMFAO LETS NOT DO THAT AGAIN
GD: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

-- clockworkMonster [CM] began pestering forCrossdressing [FC] --

CM: Hey Dee.
CM: You and your sister need to play this game with us.
FC: !!!!
FC: hello Klippa!!!
CM: Evening.
FC: oh!
FC: the Darius game???
CM: Yeah. Heard about it?
FC: TQBF was telling Dee about it!
FC: sounds scary!
FC: but we are ready!!!
FC: so ready!!!
FC: and we may have dreamed about it?????
FC: but we are not sure!
FC: but she is downloading!
FC: i am waiting!
CM: Cool, I'll let everyone know you guys are lined up.
CM: Do you see any signs of doomsday outside?
FC: ????
FC: like??
CM: Renard and Jackal both saw meteors ready to fall.
CM: Big nasty streaks of fire in the sky.
CM: I would likely see the same if it wasn't constant overcast in London tonight.
CM: Cold and damp as ever.
FC: sad!
FC: but this will heat things up!!!
FC: exciting!
CM: You girls would find the end of the world exciting.
CM: Glass is always half full, eh?
FC: oh yes!!
FC: party is always just around the corner!
FC: Dee says there is no death from above!
FC: so we are okay for now!
CM: All right, I will get back to you then.
CM: Need to concentrate on the broken remnants of Queenston's damn house.
CM: Just a hint before you play:
CM: Don't prototype anything with tentacles.
CM: Seriously.
FC: !!!!!!
FC: sounds like the most logical advice!
FC: tell Renard he is a dummy!! XD
CM: Will do.

-- clockworkMonster [CM] began pestering electrocute [EC] --

CM: This timer is getting down to the wire here, Mayhem.
CM: You should really materialize out of limbo soon.
CM: I could go sod off and find someone else.
CM: Mischief is ready. Dee and Dee are ready. Renard says Adraen is setting up too.
CM: But I'd really rather have this go down with you at my back and you know it.
CM: Get online.
CM: We need to shred this up.
CM: You know I love mixing with you, darling.
CM: Come into my lifemover arms.
EC: Damn are you sweet talkin my inbox again
EC: Hey k~~
EC: I am so very ready to fall into those arms
CM: There's the diva, sparkles and all.
EC: ♥♥♥♥~~~
CM: Good to see you.
CM: And I'd go through the whole script and the motions but time's running short.
CM: It'd be a wonder if you could sweep me a clean escape here, sweetheart.
EC: Im all wonder and you know it
EC: Dont worry your spiky head none
EC: Got my laser rifle right here
EC: Primed and fuckin ready
EC: To launch this escape mission
CM: Hell yeah.
EC: Hell yeah~